Power of Proximity
When it comes to family business, success is rarely about just strategy or numbers. More often, it’s about people. Who you invite into your circle. Who you allow at the table. And who you lean on to shape your leadership journey.
At the 2025 Bridgeforth Family Business Forum, leadership coach and dairy industry veteran Kristy Pagel explored the concept of “proximity," the power of surrounding yourself with the right people, and how it influences culture, performance, and legacy in family businesses.
Why Proximity Matters
Jim Rohn famously said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Kristy reminded us that this isn’t just true for individuals; it’s also true for businesses.
Think about your circles of influence:
Who are your advisors?
Who’s on your leadership team?
Who are you hiring, developing, and empowering inside your organization?
Every relationship is a force multiplier. The people closest to you either push your culture forward or pull it apart.
The Right People at the Table
Culture begins with who you let through the door. Kristy put it plainly: “If they’re not challenging you, if they’re not contributing, they don’t get a seat at the table.”
That’s a harsh reality, especially for family businesses where relationships and history carry significant weight. But protecting culture means protecting standards. If someone, family or not, is creating chaos instead of clarity, it’s time for honest conversations. Sometimes, that means reshaping roles so a person can contribute without compromising performance. Sometimes it means drawing boundaries that protect the business for the long term.
The lesson? Culture is shaped less by what you say and more by who you allow to influence it.
How High-Performance Cultures Die
It doesn’t take much to derail culture. Kristy didn’t hesitate when asked what kills high performance:
Lack of trust
Lack of accountability
Lack of respect
Break any one of these, and even the best businesses will stumble. That’s why leaders must be intentional about reinforcing them daily, through actions, not posters on the wall.
Declaring and Living Culture
Culture isn’t something you set once and forget. It’s something you declare, communicate, and live every day.
Kristy shared the example of a client who wove culture into everything they did. Core values showed up on hats and shirts, in the break room, and in team videos shared with new hires before their first day, translated into each employee’s primary language. That intentionality kept culture alive, not just written down.
“Different cultures can succeed,” Kristy explained. “There isn’t one right way. But there is a right way for your family. You have to declare what you want, so people know whether they’re a fit.”
The Role of Mentorship and Coaching
Proximity isn’t just about teams, it’s also about mentors and coaches. Kristy credited her own growth to people who believed in her, challenged her, and nudged her beyond her comfort zone.
“The best mentors didn’t push me off the diving board,” she said. “But they tapped my shoulder just enough that I jumped, and knew I’d be okay.”
The key is being coachable. Leaders who never stop learning, who embrace discomfort, and who seek out voices that challenge them to grow are the leaders who shape resilient family businesses.
Balancing the Individual and the Team
Much of Kristy’s work today is one-on-one with leaders. Developing individuals strengthens the team's culture. However, with new clients, she often begins by working with the group to understand the dynamics and then shifts to working with individuals for deeper growth.
It’s a reminder that culture isn’t built only in boardrooms or team retreats. It’s built in personal conversations, private coaching, and intentional development of each person’s strengths.
Hitting Pause to Evaluate Culture
Perhaps Kristy’s most practical advice was also the simplest: pause.
In agriculture and family business, we take pride in our work. Moving forward. Getting the work done. But sometimes the most powerful thing a leader can do is stop long enough to evaluate:
What culture are we living?
Does it match the culture we want?
Who is influencing us, for better or worse?
If the answers aren’t what you hoped, it’s time to get aligned with people who can help you course-correct.
Culture by Design, Not Default
Family businesses succeed when culture is intentional, not accidental. That means declaring the culture you want, reinforcing it daily, surrounding yourself with the right influences, and being willing to make hard calls, even when family is involved.
Kristy summed it up best: “Really great leaders are intentional about everything they do. And culture is no different.”
Questions for Family Business Leaders
Who are the five biggest influences on your leadership today?
Do the people at your table challenge you and contribute to your growth?
What intentional steps are you taking to declare and live your culture every day?
At Bridgeforth, we understand that culture is the heart of a family business. And we’re here to help families design it with intention.
